The Stab Of Infidelity


I am not here to write about avoiding infidelity. Infidelity, like love, anger, hate and betrayal is a part of everyday human interaction. Sometime we luck up and go through life without experiencing the heart wrenching effects of infidelity. Congratulations, the heavens have smiled fondly upon you. Today, I want to address those that have been through infidelity, not only being the victim but those that have dished it as well.
The question now becomes, Where do you go after infidelity? Do you end the relationship? Do you work through it? Do you heal? What will people say about you if it was a public betrayal? So many questions go through your mind especially if you are married.
The truth is, there is no right way or wrong way to handle infidelity.I say if both parties are willing to work through it, then you follow your heart and remember this, it is nobody's business but your own. I will also say this, if this is habitual then unless you are into poly-amorous relationships, get out, that person has no interest in maintaining your emotional and psychological well being. However, at the end of the day, do what feels right.
However, one of the biggest questions is: Why? Why do they do it? For those that have cheated, you are not necessarily a bad person. You might be going through internal turmoils of your own that has caused you to unravel in this way. Others may have just failed to find the fulfillment they craved in the relationship that they were in. I have also heard that some people are just wired that way. Whatever it is, you hope that the cheater reconciles with their dark side and sometimes they do. Sometimes my fellow readers, cheaters do change but not always.
Infidelity is most of the time, more traumatizing for the person that was cheated on. How do they regroup and is the relationship worth saving at this time? How do you trust that person again? Some of us never recuperate from infidelity, we just move on because once the trust is gone, what do you have? Even if you love the person, love without trust is as unfulfilling as it gets.
Sometimes it is just best to move on, especially if the betrayal was one that shattered your identity, your self-esteem and self-worth. But sometimes,your relationship is worth saving, especially if your flawed partner is genuinely remorseful and will do anything to make you trust them again because they understand that what they did was wrong. They also understand the extent to which they damaged you.
Infidelity is hard, and whether or not you continue with the relationship, there will be a smile waiting for you after the dust clears because you know, you made the right decision.

Well, Hi There...

I haven't blogged in years and so much has happened since 2014. So much has changed...I have finally become an American resident, my children are much older and I am no longer working minimum wage. Talk about commencing from ground zero!
I also no longer believe in home-schooling which was something I was passionate about when I just started this blog and I will tell you why. My son's speech was delayed and as smart as he was and was able to identify numbers and letters at three-years-old, he couldn't form appropriate sentences. He also had issues coping with certain loud noises and sensations. I realized something wasn't "normal" and took him to a psychologist where they were leaning towards the possibility of Sensory Processing Disorder, a mild case on the autism spectrum. However, his insurance failed before we could confirm a diagnosis, so we never went back. I decided to enroll him in school and hoped that he outgrew his fear for loud noises and unusual sensations such as, stickiness and wet floors which made him cry. I couldn't afford a psychologist but I decided that maybe interaction with other children would help, so I enrolled him into daycare and it was the best decision I ever made.
My son is 7 years old now and very articulate for the most part. He also outgrew the "Sensory Processing Disorder". Both my children are now in a charter school and doing quite well I must say. Placing them in the district school system relieves me of the stress as a working mom of having to teach them myself. My best advise to other parents is to research the schools in your area and make a wise decision regarding the school you choose to enroll them in. I chose the charter school in my school district because their teaching style and environment was diverse yet tight-knit and the children appear to get the individual and appropriate attention they need to thrive in a learning environment.

That brings me to my next point, I no longer cling to the hope of being a stay-at-home mom. Like so many beautiful independent women out there, I faced up to reality and got on the hamster wheel. However, now that I am seeking my ideal career path, my new hope is to become a a best selling author.
This brings me to my most important point. Guys... I wrote a book. Please see below and thank you for the support. This has been a long standing dream of mine to write a book and I did it and guess what, there are many more to come. It is a romance novel about an interracial couple, (you guys know I am on a quest to end racism). So far I am getting great reviews. It's a little strange but I was recently inspired to blog again, so please be on the lookout for more from me. Love you guys and stay safe out there.

 https://www.amazon.com/Love-Heartbreak-Pool-Games-Miller/dp/197682981X/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=