Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Real men like curves, bones are for what???

I saw a post on my Facebook feed a few months ago that I found quite disturbing. It was disturbing to me because where as it was positive for the body image of the "curvy" female, it was such a negative blow to the body image of the "athletic" or  "skinny" female that I was motivated to blog about it. Let me go on record to say that my body type fits the spectrum of the "skinny" female so, needless to say, I found the statement quite offensive. The statement was something akin to, real men like curves, bones are for dogs. Now I completely understand that our culture has for a long time, revered a certain body type that does not necessarily glorify plus size women, so I understand that the statement was one that was a point for plus size women everywhere. In fact, with all the hits that the plus size women's body image has taken from the media and the culture itself, this statement was a long time coming.

However, I was always of the opinion that unless a woman is suffering from anorexia or obesity, all women are beautiful, whether they are athletic or curvy. And while I denounce the fact that most men will be attracted to a woman's body before they even consider exploring the woman's less superficial features such as her brain and personality, I understand that many men do have physical preferences that range from slim to voluptuous. This does not mean that either of these women are less appealing overall. I hate that some individuals, male and female alike, will insult one body type as a way of deflecting from their personal insecurities and real men like curves and bones are for dogs, is just that. A hurtful statement designed to boost the self esteem of the plus size female, while diminishing the body image of the slim female. Is this truly the way to go? Clearly not. It is also important that we understand that trampling the body image of the plus size woman is also not okay.

In an utopic world, people would understand that due mostly to genetics, bodies come in all shapes and sizes. One is not more beautiful than the other as long as the person is healthy. It seems many people missed that memo. Having a preference for one body type does not make the other body type universally unattractive, it is simply unattractive to the individual that has a certain preference. I have met men that love slim women, men that love in-between women and men that love voluptuous women. I have also met men that love all women. Insults are so unwarranted, however, when a person is plagued with insecurities, then the ugliness comes out and I am not talking about the person's physical features.

I have personally experienced attacks from plus size women about my body size that I found offensive. Things like,
You are too skinny
Why don't you eat more
Which guy would find you attractive?

I try to turn the other cheek or defend my weight by explaining that I eat like a horse and I have a rapid metabolism in the most euphemistic way that an offended person can muster. The funny part is, some of these individuals actually believe that I should be concerned that I don't gain weight as rapidly as others. The fact is, I love my body and I enjoy being "skinny", "slim", "bony", "athletic", you name it. I enjoy it so much that I nicknamed myself "slimazz". This does not mean that I think "curvy" women are displeasing to the eyes. Not at all. Together, we all create the diverse and wide variety of beautiful women.


Unfortunately, due to the media's continuous portrayal of "slim" as beautiful or sexy which as molded a culture that have shafted the plus size women, many plus size women are fed up and are fighting back with insults. The good news is, the media is evolving and things and times are changing. The media is now making an effort to be more representative in order to uplift the self image of women and girls everywhere. Let us as




females make a commitment to ourselves to be our sister's keeper by being less critical of each other's bodies
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2 comments:

  1. SAY THAT SISTA! I am slim and I LOVE it. The men that I have dated loves slim women. I have cousins that are more curvy and their men love it. But even more importantly as long as you are happy with your body, that's what matters the most. I have grown to love and accept my body and I totally agree with you that we should be less critical of each other.

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    1. Exactly and we should all strive to be proud of what God gave us instead of tearing down each other based on personal preferences, opinions of what we think ought to be the physical norm, and personal insecurities. We should love ourselves and be less judgmental of others no matter what we/they look like.

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